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Picture 1: First Wife, Kamala on the left
and Second Wife, Putali on the right
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However, this is a story of 31 and 29
years old two Dalit single women of Jajarkot who were displaced during the time
of conflict, struggled at any cost for better life. Ms Kalpana B.Ka and Ms
Putali B.ka who despite being married at their early age of 15 and 16 to one
man, Mr.Karna B.Ka., struggled together for living after their husband’s death
in the war. They did not let their Dalit lineage and their fates of being
widowers define their life.
When Kamala B.ka was 15, she was forced to get married. Her husband was
a Maoist. She was unaware of that. When he left her for the war in 2002, she
was just 22 with three kids. Her relatives told her about her husband being
involved in the war. Later, in 2004, he came to her with his new wife. The
moment was truly devastating and shocking. With the three kids, she was unable
to be separated or get divorced. The husband started to live with his second
wife separately leaving the first all alone.
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| Putali’s new house partly supported by the project |
Later in 2009,
when Caritas Nepal introduced a reconciliation program to the internally displaced
conflict affected people in Jajarkot, Kamala and Putali became the member of
the peace group. Learning more about reconciliation, mediation and Income
generation through the group, their life has changed now.
Government
provided them with total of NRs 300,000 as compensation from the husband’s
death, which was nothing for their living. However, they divided the money
equally and used it for their own Purposes. The first wife used it for her
children’s education but the second wife unfortunately had to spend most of it
for her treatment in Delhi since she was sick for many years. Later, through
the peace project, the second wife (Putali) got NRs 20,000 support from the
peace group formed by National Peace Project for building her own house. Now,
the two wives live nearby. They cooperate and help each other in their
needs.
“I was scattered
to my husband’s death. I was unable to think about raising my children. No
money, no land, no income, .. nothing. Many times, I thought about attempting
suicide, but I couldn’t leave my children all alone. Now, at least there is hope,
after all we both are living as sisters, she was pointing to Kamala, smiling.
The hope of being together only came through the help of YARCEN and Caritas
Nepal.”- Putali
They are also the
member of the cooperative formed by Caritas. They do monthly savings and
sometimes get loan for their personal needs. Now, their main income is from 4
cows, 3 goats, 5 chickens and tailoring business. The support for their
livelihood was also from Caritas Nepal through revolving fund. Through the
project, the group received trainings and technical advice on proper livestock
management and tailoring. The advent of the project has brought new hopes and
encouragement to both.
However, they are
still struggling to live, to make their children educated. “We have to wait. I
think when our kids are over 18, our burden would be less, then they would be
able to support us,” said Kamala, concealing the dilemma under her constant
smile.
Text and
Photograph by: Susan Parajuli, Peace Desk Coordinator, Caritas Nepal
