PERSEVERIENCE: Condition of conflict affected dalit women and reconciliation and income generation effort by Caritas

Picture 1: First Wife, Kamala on the left and Second Wife, Putali on the right
While most of the part of the world is already developing, Nepali society is still in the midst of conservativeness that still considers sons more valuable. Daughter miss out on many things like –education, extracurricular activities etc.  Girls are married at a very young age, a fate that befalls many rural women, resulting high illiteracy rate and inability to become independent and self-reliant. It poses severe problems for women belonging to Dalit communities, a group considered to be untouchable and marginalized from mainstream development.

However, this is a story of 31 and 29 years old two Dalit single women of Jajarkot who were displaced during the time of conflict, struggled at any cost for better life. Ms Kalpana B.Ka and Ms Putali B.ka who despite being married at their early age of 15 and 16 to one man, Mr.Karna B.Ka., struggled together for living after their husband’s death in the war. They did not let their Dalit lineage and their fates of being widowers define their life. 



When Kamala B.ka was 15, she was forced to get married. Her husband was a Maoist. She was unaware of that. When he left her for the war in 2002, she was just 22 with three kids. Her relatives told her about her husband being involved in the war. Later, in 2004, he came to her with his new wife. The moment was truly devastating and shocking. With the three kids, she was unable to be separated or get divorced. The husband started to live with his second wife separately leaving the first all alone.
Putali’s new house partly supported by the project
In 2005, their husband rejoined the war and in 2006 he was killed by the Nepal Army at the very peak time of war in Dailekh. At that very moment, the second wife, Putali had one and half year old son and was 3 months pregnant.  The news was heart-breaking for both of the wives. The first wife at least had a place to live but the second one was living with her parents. She had no place to live and no income to earn. “It’s been about 9 years I started to struggle for surviving. After my husband died, I was mentally paralyzed.  I went to beg my husband’s co-wife for giving me and my children a place to stay, but she didn’t allow me to enter; she used to hate me a lot.” Restricted yet ambitious, Putali always prioritized her son’s education and would do labor work in the village to send him to school.
Later in 2009, when Caritas Nepal introduced a reconciliation program to the internally displaced conflict affected people in Jajarkot, Kamala and Putali became the member of the peace group. Learning more about reconciliation, mediation and Income generation through the group, their life has changed now.


Government provided them with total of NRs 300,000 as compensation from the husband’s death, which was nothing for their living. However, they divided the money equally and used it for their own Purposes. The first wife used it for her children’s education but the second wife unfortunately had to spend most of it for her treatment in Delhi since she was sick for many years. Later, through the peace project, the second wife (Putali) got NRs 20,000 support from the peace group formed by National Peace Project for building her own house. Now, the two wives live nearby. They cooperate and help each other in their needs.   

“I was scattered to my husband’s death. I was unable to think about raising my children. No money, no land, no income, .. nothing. Many times, I thought about attempting suicide, but I couldn’t leave my children all alone. Now, at least there is hope, after all we both are living as sisters, she was pointing to Kamala, smiling. The hope of being together only came through the help of YARCEN and Caritas Nepal.”- Putali

They are also the member of the cooperative formed by Caritas. They do monthly savings and sometimes get loan for their personal needs. Now, their main income is from 4 cows, 3 goats, 5 chickens and tailoring business. The support for their livelihood was also from Caritas Nepal through revolving fund. Through the project, the group received trainings and technical advice on proper livestock management and tailoring. The advent of the project has brought new hopes and encouragement to both.

However, they are still struggling to live, to make their children educated. “We have to wait. I think when our kids are over 18, our burden would be less, then they would be able to support us,” said Kamala, concealing the dilemma under her constant smile.

Text and Photograph by: Susan Parajuli, Peace Desk Coordinator, Caritas Nepal